I bet you also still remember your first love, even if it was an unrequited one. Needless to say that your first, maybe not even a very long one, but still successful at the beginning romantic relationship, you will remember forever. Nope, this is not because your first partner was perfect, and your current one is worse in many ways. It is solely due to the fact that the first successful love is always very emotionally intense. There are many factors that cause you to feel like you will never be able to forget your first romantic relationship.
Does it mean that you will always be comparing your romantic partners with the first one? Should you fear that your current partner will be comparing you with his or her first one? Of course not! Love is about experiencing strong emotions, especially for the first time. I doubt that you remember every single aspect of your very first romantic relationship. You only recall your emotions and reactions to the new, very pleasant, and fresh situation in your life. Even though you will never forget this hurricane of emotions, and it never is repeated, under no circumstances, it means that you will never be as happy again with a beauty whom you can find on some Russian dating site. However, let’s dig deeper and find out the main reasons why you have never forgotten your first girlfriend.
10 Main reasons why it is impossible to forget your first romantic partner
From first glance, the answer seems to be very simple. You will never forget your first girlfriend because you were young and everything was for the first time then. Surely, this is a very nice answer, but it doesn’t cover all the real reasons for this. Humans are very complex beings, especially when we are talking about romance and love. Plus, we all remember our first relationships differently. This is due to the fact that we remember them purely on an emotional level. And everyone feels emotions differently. However, we still can create a list of the main reasons why you have never forgotten your first girlfriend.
- It was the first time when you have experienced real intimacy with someone
People never forget the first moments of intimacy. You can ask anyone about their memories of the first hug, kiss, cuddle, and their first sex. I am sure that you will see pleased smiles on their faces, well maybe not in the last case, but still. This is due to the fact that humans simply can’t forget those gentle moments of having goosebumps after hugging or kissing their first crushes because they get in our minds forever.
- It was a very innocent love
For better or for worse, this was the only moment in your life when you had truly innocent love. You will never have it again. You see, when people fall in love for the first time, they never expect anything bad, because they don’t have history and experience of problematic romantic relationships. At this stage, they enter the new world of romance, and for them, it is still filled with mysterious and pleasant things. This is why you still remember that when you entered the world of love for the first time, the whole world looked more beautiful, and life seemed to be perfect. Unfortunately, there is no coming back to those feelings. And this is what makes them so special.
- You faced new problems and discovered hidden insecurities
When you fall in love for the first time, among pleasant things, you also face problems. Those problems eventually reveal your hidden insecurities. You may not even know before you fall in love for the first time that you are a very jealous person. The same goes for clinginess, dependence, and other romantic and love-related problems that can make everyone lose themselves and feel depressed. When this happens, you feel helpless and even weak. Needless to say that those emotions are not very easy to forget.
- You believed that you would always be together
Due to the fact that you have never experienced love before, when you find a crush for the first time, you approach this feeling as something absolutely pure and perfect. Psychologists call it puppy love. When two people feel so-called puppy love, they believe that it will last forever. It is obvious that they make plans together and believe that they will never break up. Also, this explains why teenagers suffer so much after painful and bitter breakups. They simply can’t kill this feeling inside, and still can’t see their lives without their former romantic partners. This is what slowly drives them to depressions if they don’t receive enough support.
- Love seemed to be pure and perfect feeling
Talking about perfect and pure love, we can’t omit moments when this directly affects the quality of your memories. You see, when you fell in love for the first time, you didn’t see problems in your relationship. You and your crush, literary wore pink glasses, until the moment when your love casually faded away. However, those perfect moments are extremely hard to forget. Your age and maturity don’t matter, because deep in your soul, you will always want to come back to those perfect romantic feelings. Today, you remember them as perfect moments, because of one of the main qualities of our memory. As you know, we tend to forget bad moments. Thus, our happy memories are always brighter than reality truly was.
- It was very intense and joyful
These exciting moments of feeling intense and joyful love will remain in your memories forever. You will remember forever that your first love was very emotionally intense, and all your quarrels seemed to be the ends of the world. These peaks of emotional joy and pain make your first romantic relationships unforgettable. Plus, you understand that you will never be able to repeat everything again. Thus, you unintentionally struggle to keep those memories forever. It is the same as it used to be then: there is nothing your brain can do with your intense, both painful and joyful first love.
- You were exploring unknown
When you fall in love for the first time, you and your crush both felt like explorers. Together, you were traveling deeper and deeper into the unknown land of love. Step by step, you were creating the map of this land, by slowly understanding the main principles of love. To make a long story short, this is the most stronger “first” memory in your life. Think about any extremely pleasant moment in your life and then multiply that pleasant euphoria by a couple of hundred times. Even this may not fully resemble the true force of the impact that your first romantic relationship poured on your mind.
- You didn’t have other responsibilities
Most frequently, people fall in love at a very young age. Thus they don’t have adult problems. For example, they have no debts, problems with job, career, family, children, and social pressure. All those things can make you feel that your life is breaking apart. When you were a teenager, you had only one serious responsibility. You had to do well in your classes. Consequently, you had plenty of time to spend with your very first significant other. Some psychologists even compare first romantic relationship with a full-time job. Today, you definitely know what is more pleasant. For this very reason, your first love for the whole life.
- The very first breakup
Sadly, your first love ended with your very first breakup. We have already mentioned its huge impact on teenagers. Thus, it is not surprising that humans can’t forget the first moment when they felt heartbroken. Some say that the first breakup is the most painful one because it shows you imperfection of love. As a teenager, when dealing with the first breakup, you had not only to deal with the necessity to live without your crush but also to get used to knowing that love is not what it seemed to be.
- False expectations and painful sense of regret
When people fall in love for the first time, they tend to give all themselves into this game of love. Also, teenagers often suffer from problems with personal boundaries. This is because they yet don’t understand the main principles of love. Also, for this very reason, you did stupid things when you fall in love for the first time. With time, those small mistakes tend to accumulate and turn into a wrecking ball that probably destroyed your love and relationship. Of course, you have never expected this to happen, and you will never stop regretting making them.
Is there a way to forget your first girlfriend
You see, even though you will never forget your first girlfriend, there is still a way to hide those memories deep in your brain. As you may know, to memorize something, you need to repeat it many times or to make those things emotional. It is obvious that first love is the second case. However, it doesn’t mean that you can’t hide those memories in two simple steps.
Stop thinking about your past times, because, by doing this, you are only memorizing those moments more.
- New memories
The second step is to redirect your attention. Thus, instead of dreaming about your past, you should focus on your present. Try something new together with your current partner. This will help you to create new pleasant emotions and memories.